Commenters online were shocked when an individual said they recently discovered they were born intersex and had their genitals removed after birth with the permission of their parents.
The original poster (OP), or u/Intelligent_Source63, posted about the situation on Sunday in Reddit’s popular forum, “True Off My Chest” where it received nearly 10,000 upvotes and 700 comments. The post can be found here.
The Intersex Society of North America (ISNA) defines intersex as an umbrella term for individuals who are “born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t seem to fit the typical definitions of female or male.”
According to Human Rights Watch, an organization that conducts research and advocacy on human rights, estimated that 1 in 2,000 babies in the United States are born intersex each year. In many of these situations, medical professionals might recommend surgical intervention to make the genitals meet “arbitrary standards.”
Alvaro Moreno Perez/iStock
The Post
In the post titled, “Found out I’m intersexual and had my genitals removed at birth,” the original poster (OP) explained that she wasn’t interested in “feminine” things growing up and described herself as a “tomboy and a lesbian.
The OP said one time at the gynecologist the doctor gave her mom a “weird look” during the appointment. “Now I think I know why lol,” she wrote.
The other day, the OP and her family were drinking together when she commented about how comfortable she felt with her shaved head. When her aunt heard her, she “burst into tears.”
The OP said her aunt repeatedly said, “I’m so sorry, I should have stopped them!” She said her parents tried to “shush and shut her up,” and that her grandparents got red in the face.
Later I asked what they were talking about, and they reminded me how [they] always told me that I had been born with my ‘Vagina’ closed off and they had to perform surgery to open it,” the OP wrote. “Well, turns out I had a dick. And a vagina.”
“They called me a hermaphrodite(?) and told me that it was the best decision they could have done for me,” the OP wrote. “Sigh. Don’t really know how to feel. It’s always been a difficult topic in my family that I decided to embrace my more masculine side why, and now I know.”
The OP told Newsweek that while she understands things were different 20 years ago, she’s angry that her parents took such an important decision away from her.
“It’s definitely bringing up ideas about how would I feel better about myself, and what I would like to do,” she said, referring to her sexual identity, who also added that she hopes people in similar situations know that there are people they can reach out to online for resources or support.
“…There are kind people out there wanting to help,” she said. “I’ve received so much information and referrals to communities that could help me this past night since posting that’s left me speechless. There’s always a helping hand out there.”
Redditors React
Nearly 600 users commented on the post, with many offering their support.
“I have a cousin that this happened to. Was born intersex and they made the decision to make him a girl due to the information they had,” one commenter wrote. “Around puberty, he started wanting to be a boy and they supported his transition. I feel like sometimes the best thing is to leave everything alone if it’s functionally ok and let the person decide.”
Meanwhile, another user commented: “From a nonbinary lesbian: there is no wrong way to be a woman, there is no wrong way to be a man, and there is nothing wrong with being neither or both.”
“Unless it’s not possible, leave both sets of genitals and let the person decide later in life,” said another user.
In the 1960s, medical professionals began suggesting corrective surgery for babies born with sexual or reproductive anatomy—referred to as the Hopkins model and led by psychologist John Money.
“As the Hopkins model spread throughout the developed world, surgeons performed cosmetic genital surgeries on intersex children without their consent, believing this was necessary and efficacious,” the ISNA writes on its website.
